Friday Finds March 2013
I am taking a 3 day weekend and I could not be any happier about the prospect of not waking up to an alarm for 3 days in a row. Also pretty pumped about no crazy storms this weekend and some time to get outside- cabin fever has definitely set in for me and I’m ready for spring.
I spent a good portion of September 2011 through, well, just about last month, in a somewhat hermit state. Some of it was from my tiny budget, some of it from my general uneasiness about my ‘situation’, but mostly because I was turned into myself trying to figure out life. But after a year or more spending almost every night on my couch in sweatpants, I’ve had enough. So when I read this piece on Thought Catalog about not being a hermit any longer, it definitely struck a chord with me.
One of the hardest things for me to come to terms with has been the “I’m divorced” statement. I have never doubted the decision I made, but that doesn’t mean there still isn’t some sadness over the failed marriage. This piece on divorce under 30 on HuffPo is so true– especially this line– “[But] divorce is the end of life as you knew it, not your life as it was meant to be.” That idea is what has pushed me through some darker moments of sadness and what I hold on to on the days when some things still feel like a struggle. And it is SO TRUE about divorced folks under 30 being a super secret thing– divorce might not be as taboo as it was in the 1950s, but I can’t tell you how many times the comments or looks I have from people about my marital status makes me think we are still back in 1955. When I find another person- man or woman- who has had a similar situation happen to them- I feel a connection to them already knowing what they’ve been through.
Speaking of love, Eleni wrote this really awesome blog about things couples do that make her swoon. This made my heart happy because so many times a day I find myself smiling when I see strangers extending their love for each other. My divorce taught me a lot about love and its various forms, but didn’t leave me bitter and unhappy. I believe in love now more than ever and find because of that I see it in small ways around me more often too.
I’m sitting comfortably into the often uncomfortable place of not knowing what’s next in life. There are moments when it’s completely terrifying, often followed by moments of extreme excitement about opportunity and possibilities. Tiny Buddha always seems to have articles right when I need to read them, and this was no exception. By not freaking out about not having a five year plan, I’m really allowing myself to think about what I want, and that satisfaction far surpasses the feeling of uncertainty about the future.
Renee wrote about blogging and privacy, something I think a lot about. It makes me feel a bit awkward sometimes knowing family and coworkers read the blog, but I’m also proud to have the space in the world to express my self and be a part of a community. I made a lot of personal decisions about privacy when I began blogging that I try to stick to, but often times struggle with wanting to share a story or experience that others might have issue with. It’s something I suppose is in the nature of sharing( in any space, online or otherwise), but it’s a topic frequently on my mind.
Monday is extra special in that it will be the 100th blog post for me! Something fun is in store.
Enjoy the weekend and hope there is sunshine where you are!
Not sure if this helps, but I actually know more people my age who are divorced than are married. I was cleaning out my closet a couple of months ago and gave away some dresses that I was holding onto for sentimental reasons. Oh, I wore this to my cousin’s wedding and I wore that to my friend’s wedding seemed to be moot points when I realized that both of those marriages have already ended…..
Happy Belated Birthday Kristen!!!